Jorge Ben – Zé Canjica

This song is Toronto to me. I remember exploring the city on my own and walking through the Kensington neighbourhood. I sauntered at one-quarter the tempo, really soaked everything in. The sun was enveloping, not bright. A world traveller’s closet was hanging from every apartment, and on racks outside of weird basement thrift shops.

It felt like everyone had moved outside for the summer and by happenstance, I had been invited into their living room.

Side Note: I came across this song while exploring a great blog project called Dust and Grooves.

A quick google translation of the lyrics:

It’s raining and the rain will dampen anyone
That once fell all wet
In my arms
There is no truth, there can be
There is no truth, there can be
Silence goes away makes me forgiveness
Silence goes away makes me forgiveness
Sorry my friends we
If I’m confused
And sad and even grumpy
But is that I am no longer
Boyfriend of my love
I know my tide is not practical fish
But I will not give up fishing because
For me there is still a thread of hope
And the will to live
Prá can win back her
Prá can win back her
Silence goes away makes me forgiveness
Silence goes away makes me forgiveness
But is that I am no longer
Ze Canjica my love
But is that I am no longer
Ze Canjica my love
Silence goes away makes me forgiveness

Daydreams

The volatile feeling of wanting so badly
For something that will come in its own time.
In my daydreams, I imagine its arrival.
These dreams soothe my addiction for a finite outcome,
The methadone response for damaging uncertainty.

How tempting to find the world flat with finite edges!
To know there is a final place to go, that the journey can be
about the ending and not the in-between.
To be a fish finding a new home, finally thriving without water.

These dreams are an illusion set forth for staying the journey.
A boozy fog that leaves only half-formed memories,
I drink in the daydreams to quiet my anxieties and then
Wake up in the oppressive hangover of reality.

Weakened, I submit again…

…I cannot wait to feel real.

Tamer and Hawk

Faber Anthology

Read all the way through for the surprise twist ending!

I attended some of the East Van Culture Crawl last weekend but in a fairly typically me fashion my favorite part of the day was rummaging through a church’s used book sale. I bought one book, what is turning out to be a rather promising anthology. This one poem is why I bought it…I’m always a sucker for a good love poem. Totally worth the dollar.

Tamer And Hawk

By Thom Gunn

I thought I was so tough,
But gentled at your hands
Cannot be quick enough
To fly for you and show
That when I go I go
At your commands.

Even in flight above
I am no longer free:
You seeled me with your love,
I am blind to other birds –
The habit of your words
Has hooded me.

As formerly, I wheel
I hover and I twist,
But only want the feel,
In my possessive thought,
Of catcher and of caught
Upon your wrist.

You but half-civilize,
Taming me in this way.
Through having only eyes
For you I fear to lose,
I lose to keep, and choose
Tamer as prey.

Now here comes the mind-bending part. Typically upon reading something like this, especially when the book is old, you expect that it’s a man writing about a woman. Given this misunderstanding my friend and I had an entire conversation following this about gender dynamics in relationships. Well pals, Thomas Gunn, for those like me who didn’t know, was an openly gay poet.

I love the idea of love without gender, a real equality of “catcher and caught” with no preconceived idea of who is prey and who is the predator. It seems like there would be a lot of freedom in that.